July 2009 Blog Posts (8)

You have been gone
A while now
But still with us,too. So many things...
Have come up..I miss driving down there.
I have made mistakes.
I remember your wisdom,your nonjudgementalism
So hard to practice with myself
I have to now.
I could laugh with you
I could cry with you
You always helped me remember to love myself
No matter what
You helped more than anyone
You touched all of our lives
I love you,Bob...miss you

I had a dream about Bob last night that I want to share with you all. I dreamed I went to his house for our appointment, and things got immediately hazy and confusing. Instead of sitting and talking to me, Bob seemed to be in a hurry, but had a number of gifts for me. Most of them i didn't know what they were, or what they were used for. One I remember clearly was a knitted shawl. This one was significant because I knit, often knitting shawls. He was giving me my own gift! As I was calling to… Continue

Just four months ago
I told him be my guest
go take your Journey

I would not have known
How to allow him to leave
Had he not coached me

Gabe: I regret that
my children will not know him
I: through you they will

Little Adina
remarkable at his side
From where such big strength?

Choking on her tears:
"d'you think he knew I was there?"
I know you're here now

Dear Friends and Family of Bob, Just wanted to visit and say hello and send well wishes. I have not been on in a while. I continue to try and apply all I have learned from Bob in my life as dilemmas, of course, come about as they do,sometimes small and some very seemingly big....I try and think of what Bob would say, I read spiritual literature, and talk to friends. Noone will ever, that I know of, come again in the way he did to help. Accepting his absence and feeling that has been so very… Continue

Avi believed that in order to truly understand a concept (like inevitability of death) you need to practice, spend time pondering the meaning of it, like you do with a mantra. This haiku, again, reminds me to stay alert in preparation for more (inevitable) loss:

There's no bargaining
With our life's impermanence
There is no sale price

Few days ago a letter arrived in the mail, addressed to Avi. I opened it and I realized the person who wrote it did not know that Avi had passed, so I let her know. I feel I should share her beautiful response:



"Thank you so very much for emailing me and letting me know of your beloved's transition. I was quite stunned, and yes, I did cry with sadness, gratitude, peace and joy in my heart. While our paths crossed but for a short time, his presence and what he shared was and is… Continue

avi loved this quote:

"Once the realization is accepted that even between the closest human beings infinite distances continue to exist, a wonderful living side by side can grow, if they succeed in loving the distance between them which makes it possible for each to see the other whole against the sky."

— Rainer Maria Rilke



and i just read this quote, i'm not exactly sure ... i need avi to explain it to me:

"It seems to me that almost all our sadnesses are moments of… Continue

I came across a minature (2" x 2") hand made book of haiku made by Avi .



Here is the content:



I want to make sure

that life's end doesn't find me

wishing I had laughed more



This is the lowdown

those things that matter, matter

those things that don't, don't



No matter my age

I will always house a child

who won't understand



It's just this simple

how I see it is how I live

how I live is me



How… Continue